woman at eand of peer

Some Had to Die

Okay, I know that is a startling, if not overly dramatic, line to start a blog with but… in a much more subtle way, it’s true. Let me explain…

In 2020 and 2021, quite a few unexpected changes were born in my life. Most of them I didn’t even see coming. Many of my relationships changed drastically without warning. Most changed for the best and others have yet to reveal their true nature.

I took a very intuitive look at my relationships. I slowed down. I paid close attention to how I felt when I was around someone. How I felt talking to you on the phone. Does he (she, her, them …) listen? Does she talk about uplifting things or is it all negativity and gossip? Is it a fun conversation? Am I learning anything? Are we laughing? What’s the vibe in the room? I tried to consider everything important.

I also paid attention to how I came off. Am I giving anything to them? What’s the energy that I bring to this? Do I steer away from gossip or jump right in? Do I dim my light when I talk to them or shine brighter? Do we talk on and on about nothing? Is this a comfortable conversation? Are we and can we be honest with each other?

What I found disappointed me at first. I think, mostly because I was surprised by what had really been going on in my relationships. I found that most of my conversations were repeating the same old stuff we had had talked about many times before with the same outcomes. The same problems. With me or her giving the same old advice. The same he said she said, he saw she saw; he needs to. She should. I wish I had. I wish I could; I want to, one day I will… and so on and so on.

But there were some good things too. There were a few key relationships where I found good stuff. Laughing and reliving fun times, some of the hilarious things we did in the past. Conversations that were thought provoking. Talk that moved to growth. There was substance. Feel good stuff. Pats on the back and “girl you got this” stuff. Help with my business and me helping them with theirs. Even simpler things like recipes and good store buys. And there were times where I had genuine fun. Just damn funny s…

So, after a real close look at all my relationships, some of them had to be downsized, categorized, or reclassified. Some of them had to be cut loose. 

In order to continue to grow in the direction of my dreams, some of them  had to die. It’s just best.

So, how are your relationships? Taken inventory lately?

One Love  ☮


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